Posts Tagged ‘Knowledge’

The other day I updated my Facebook status to this:

“IF ANYBODY KNOWS SOMEONE RICH WHO WOULD LIKE TO GET MARRIED FAST, LET ME KNOW!
I just calculated how much money I will owe after my Bachelor degree…”

And yes, ha-ha, very funny, I know…
But it did get me thinking! What if someone rich actually DID approach me?
I keep imagining the following conversation to unfold:
“Yes, hello, I’m rather rich, and I would consider marrying you…”
“Great then, as long as you agree to pay for my tuition – up to a full PhD, it’s done! :D”
“Well, I’d agree to that, but what could you offer me?”
…Obviously, I can’t expect a random rich person to marry me and pay up without getting anything in return. But what would I offer? Sexual services are not an option, simply because I’m neither experienced not attractive enough for a future husband/wife to benefit of our marriage solely based on that, especially since I’m not open to the all-too-weird stuff.
“Well, you’ve obviously got the talent and the money, and I’ve got the ehm… The education. Yes?”
…Nope, wouldn’t work.
“Extensive knowledge of serial killers and various methods of torture?”
…But now that we think about it, that’s not really qualities you look for in a future wife now, is it?
“I’m like, REALLY good at texting! Yeah?”
…Wouldn’t cut it.
“I can make you some origami decorations?”
…Aaaah, tempting! But alas, NO. -___-
“I wouldn’t be in your way?”
…Neither would a mail order bride!  Besides, I’d say getting my education funded would be ‘being in the way’, economically speaking.
“I’d tweet nice things about you and let everyone I know on Facebook know how much I love you?”
…Really? I couldn’t just… _Pay_ someone to do that?
“I’d give you more children than you can count, and guarantee you an… heir?”
…Is this really the qualities it comes down to? An heir? When is this, the 17th century??

Though I DO realise I basically just said that I WOULD whore myself out for a financially secured education, but that I lack the qualities of a common prostitute 😛 Either way, my point is that I don’t have much to bring into a relationship but myself, and though that in many ways may be a lot, that is still not all there is to a relationship.

But further more, I not only need this hypothetical persons money for my education! I also need it for a flat with a proper boiler and FUCKING HOT WATER! I mean, are you kidding me? My showering routine now consists of boiling a full kettle of water three times, pouring the boiling water into a bucket, before adding enough cold water to fill the bucket, then place it in the bathtub together with a smaller bowl and my shampoo, conditioner and body wash. When this is done, I have to lower myself into the (COLD) bathtub, and use the smaller bowl to pour the luke warm water over my head/body. Yeah, wow! Very medieval.
Why? Because not only did someone in the building turn off and on the water in the building without telling us, so that air would gather in our pipes and create an immense pressure resulting in no hot water coming out of the boiler, and a massive leak in our cupboard, which lead to water getting into our washing machine and short circuiting the whole flat for a few days, but when they fixed the leak, our hot water would not return! GAH! We’ve had people running in and out of our flat for days on end now, to get everything fixed, but it’s yet to be resolved completely. We’ve got electricity and a washing machine again though, so we’re happy about that 🙂

 

And it’s not all doom and gloom, Friday is coming up, and do we know what’ll happen then? 😀
INA WILL BE HERE! She’s visiting from Friday to Wednesday, and I’m really looking forward to it 😀
It’ll be so much fun =^___^=

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